Tuesday, January 04, 2005

The Dreaded Lurgi Again.

Well folks, another day with the dreaded lurgi. I have decided that every germ on the planet finds its way to my body. I could eat healthy, drink 34 gallons of water a day and everything else that goes along with good health and still some random germ would make its way into my system.

I can see it now, an entire germ family complete with luggage and a couple of kid germs whining things like, "are we there yet?, can I drive?, I gotta go to the bathroom., Germy won't stop looking at me." the whole nine yards. I can see them crossing the vast ocean to get into my poor body once again. While the kid germs play, the parents sit with a map planning...

"Ohh Sam look! Let's see the esophagus too shall we? Let's do it on the way to the lungs. What a treat that will be for the kids!" "Well for God's sake Ella, we had this all planned, we're on a budget you know." "Ohh Sam, this may be the only time we get to take the kids on a trip like this. You know this person is considering seeing that, that Dr. Whatshisname to get antibiotics...*sob** *sob*" "then we may never see them grow up and **sob** multiplyyy... **sob** "There, there dear, don't mutate,we'll take the kids through the esophagus too, it'll be alright..."

Yes folks, that's what is going on in my system this very moment. Not a pretty picture is it? I think I'll eat 3000 cloves of fresh garlic. That should do the trick and burn those little suckers outta my system. And if it doesn't work, at least I know everyone else will leave me alone for awhile. Just think, smelling like that I could stand on a corner near a pizzeria and entice people to come in for Italian food. I wonder if they would pay me for that? And would the IRS consider reeking of garlic to attract customers a real job?


  • Awww....your little germ family is kinda cute! Hope they move out of you soon though :)

    By Blogger Toni, at 8:25 AM  

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