Thursday, March 03, 2005

The Hyatt Rodency Repost

After reading about a little bastard mouse on another blog, I thought I would repost this story. I have tried to be kind to the mice but still rid my house of them. Fortunately there aren't mice here anymore or the cat would eat them. Anyway, enjoy!

Well folks, it’s time for yet another commentary on what I consider to be an interesting or unique find. I think this one leans more toward the interesting as it isn’t terribly unique. The object I’m writing about is none other than a “humane” mouse trap. I have a problem with those nasty snap traps because I feel uncomfortable about killing the mice.

There are glue traps that aren’t much better. You place the sticky trap down and the unknowing rodent is drawn to the bait and once he/she steps onto the sticky gluck, they are there to stay. Unless you want to remove the rodent’s feet and I personally feel that this isn’t the best of options. I would then feel really guilty because I would have footless mice roaming the house on tiny crutches. Well crutches until someone designed prosthetics for mice.

This humane, miracle of the new age trap consists of a see through plastic tube/box with a swinging door that allows the rodent in and once he/she enters and retrieves the tasty prize of bread, cannot exit and is trapped until it is released totally unharmed as well as fed, into the wild again. This sounded great! Finally, an easy, safe way to rid my house of the unwelcome guests.

I “armed” the trap with a small piece of cheese. The packaging suggests smearing peanut butter around the outside of the door in order to attract rodents. Since this was too messy and we all know how much mice love cheese, (at least in cartoons anyway) I smeared a small amount of cheese on the trap door in order to lure the tiny beast into the trap. Now comes the hard part, the wait for an occupant. After a couple of hours, what I got when I checked was nada. Now for those of you who don’t know what “nada” means, it means “nothing”. And that is exactly what I got- nothing.

Disbelieving, I peered into the box and lo and behold, my eyes were not deceiving me, it was empty. No rodent, no cheese, no nothing. I picked the box up and inspected it but found neither defects nor any large holes gnawed in the sides where a jail break may have occurred. The tiny escape artist had apparently left the way he/she had come, through the trap door.

I was amazed that what I thought to be a trap was in reality, a small rodent dining car. Rather like a Hyatt Rodency. Accept that little Harry Rodini had vacated the dining car while dragging along a hunk of cheese. I couldn’t believe it. The furry little bastard had ripped me off again! I put the trap down and threw my hands into the air and pretty much gave up on even the slightest chance of any successful rodent removal.

Later that evening once my frustration had subsided, I decided not to give in to the fact that I would be “rodentized” regardless of my good intentions, so I gave it one more try. I re-armed the trap and placed it back in the same spot. Hopeful that yet another member of the Rodent Club would venture in for a midnight snack at the bar, I went to bed.

I slept that night and dreamt of large mice with hacksaws sawing their way to freedom from a cage with plastic bars. There was a big bar/club in the middle complete with tattooed (bearing the word “Mom”) bartender serving several rodents who were having drinks, smoking big cigars and chatting. This was to say the least, an odd dream. Upon wakening, I decided that mouse or not, this day was the end of it.

Sleepy-eyed I walked into the kitchen and opened the cabinet and there in the Hyatt Rodency sat a calm and collect rodent still clutching and nibbling the cheese he/she was lured in there with. Now I don't know if the mice sensed my agitation at having one escape and simply felt sorry for me and decided to stay, but in any case, there it was. I could almost see the outline of a map to get back to the house in its tiny little pocket.

That the rodent might come back didn’t deter my glee at having captured one of the annoying beasts. If anything it had given me a jump-start on capturing more. The mouse was taken to a location of relative safety far away from the house and set free to roam the fields and begin a new life. Hopefully one that doesn’t include my house or me. I went home and replaced the cheese that Harry Rodini had taken to tide him over until his crops come in and began the long wait for another dinner guest.

These are the times that animal lovers dream of. A safely released rodent and the knowledge that more would follow. It made me feel good that my plan to use a humane mousetrap had indeed succeeded and that I could help relocate wayward rodents and their families into a new life of rural farming.

That’s it for now on the home front of the strange and unusual, until next time.

4 Comments:

  • get a nice animal. then you'll be REALLY sad when it dies. isn't that what love is all about ?

    By Blogger Deek Deekster, at 9:20 AM  

  • Actually, the mouse and his tummy full of cheese probably made a nice snack for a hawk, snake, or some other preditor that came along to eat it alive since it was no longer in the saftey of its warm home.

    By Blogger Pressed, at 2:49 PM  

  • Ohhh that's right, take my kindness and still try and make me out to be cruel. Send me your mailing address pressed and I'd be happy to mail YOU the mice the next time they invade. Ha!

    By Blogger Kate Ford, at 6:57 PM  

  • yuck..I dislike anything from the rodent family. Mice included. But I do believe in kindness to animals, so in this case looking after yourself comes first.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:21 PM  

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